My Shadow, My True Self
by Syphira
Summary: Ever get that feeling where you just feel so helpless, that you don't even want anyone to try and help?; Takes place in Setting of "Yasogami Busters!"; CanonxOC; You get the picture; Rated T.


_**A.N: I highly doubt I still have people who still read my stories from back where I wrote Yasogami Busters, but even so.**_

_**I plan on rewriting Yasogami Busters, soon! It'll be named the same way, just as Redux, and I don't think I want to start on it or anything of the sort until I finish Mechanized. So, you're going to have to bear with the one shots for awhile.**_

_**Remilia Konagi was an OC I have, and Yosuke is obviously Yosuke Hanamura.**_

_**This is set in the same timeline as Yasogami Busters; Just with much less mary-sueish type writing, and more advanced writing!**_

_**Persona 4 and the Shin Megami Tensei series obviosuly belongs to ATLUS.**_

_**Enjoy!**_

* * *

It had been both a chatty evening yet a quiet night in the Hanamura residence, and Remilia wasn't expecting it to turn out this way at all. When she was invited to dinner by Yosuke's family, she couldn't help turn down the invitation because she would've seemed rude of her to even do so. She did not want to make a horrible impression on his parents, and more so, she did not want to make some sort of horrible impression on herself. This _was _the kid who owned the store of Junes – and she _didn't _want any sort of horrible reputation being spread about the vicinity when she decided to hang out with Yu and all the others. Not that she would expect the adults or even Yosuke _himself _to do that, after all, but she couldn't help shake the feeling ever since she saw the video that her mother had sent her.

It had been traumatizing, yet strangely irritating to the periwinkle-haired female. She had requested if Yosuke could come over to her house after school – much to Dojima's demise, but Nanako's liking – and Remilia had received a package coming from her original residence in Japan at some point from other mother. She was pleased to hear that her mother was _legitimately capable _of sending her packages at time like this, but at the same time, the package was fairly small – and only seemed like it was wrapped to the point where it could fit into a tiny box and be shipped. She would do nothing but squeal and spin a few times – Yosuke giving off his goofy grin towards her direction for seeing her happy, but then not realizing that it would do nothing but break her into pieces once she had slipped in the video tape and turned on the TV once they got settled into the futon next to each other. Granted, Yosuke had mentioned before that he had a bad feeling about it.

However...

...She could remember the words now; Her mother had called her nothing but a useless child whose dreams could never be achieved, no matter what effort she put into making it happen. She would be seen drinking numerous bottles of alcohol in a random pub in America – constantly bashing her father about his occupation, or how he was incapable of treating her the way she wanted to be treated. Every word and every laugh that escaped the woman's lips killed Remilia's smile as if a murderer were to be taking a knife and constantly harming her body to make sure she was dead inside. Yosuke's intuition had been right, but he wouldn't admit it at a time like that. He could hear Remilia shuffle in her seat with her hand over her heart, not exactly sure whether he should get closer to the female or just stay back and allow her to cry – should she want to spill tears at that moment. When Remi realized it, she had taken notice that her life almost felt a little too perfect – a little too _plastic_ for some reason. When that happened, she had begun to spout random nonsense and eject the tape from the player – dropping it to the floor and trembling at a time like that.

"Mom never wanted me, right. . ?" She would let out a soft chuckle – one that basically reflected off the side of her that slowly died inside, "You.. Y-You were right, Hanamura; I should have never played that video...tape.."

When she fell to her knees from feeling weak at the response, Yosuke was the one who knelt down to catch her and stay level with her. She would act out of surprise, and attempt to lash, but instead she found herself locking eyes with the brown-eyed male – his headphones slightly sliding down his neck. The only words that escaped her lips were ones that basically made her deny that there was anything good about her – words that she seemed to be keeping pent inside for so long, that she would've shattered to pieces if she allowed anymore to be left secretive. Right when she was about to tell Yosuke to leave her house, she had felt a sudden embrace coming from his direction – blood red eyes dilated at the contact, due to the fact that she had never really been hugged like this ever since she was a child. She couldn't even find a way to respond – she just...

Her cracking came to an abrupt stop for a bit.

"Y-_Yosuke_..?"

"Listen," He would mutter as he gripped onto her tighter than before – eyes half-lidded while he tried to find words to say to her, "I know it's hard to take this all in at once – believe me, I thought your mother was a pretty cool person, too; However.. you _cannot _allow it to take you down and out like this, Remi. You're the leader of this Investigation Team that we have, remember?"

While he gave her this sudden lecture, she would suddenly feel her arms begin to wrap around him; shakily, but still working, nonetheless.

"Chie, Yukiko... even _Teddie_ is relying on you to get to the bottom of this and stop it all before it gets worse," Hanamura would attempt to soothe her by playing with her locks of hair, and would keep her in his grasp despite it being so embarrassing. "Oh, dammit; _I _am counting on you to help me bring this killer to justice! You're my partner, remember? We decided to make this team because we had more in common with our goals than anything else."

All Remilia could remember from that would be the two of them hugging and then taking a nap next to each other after everything had happened...

...She watched as Yosuke walked out of his room to say good night and be constantly reminded to lay out another futon for Remilia – although, she rejected and said she would rather snuggle up with the sheets for the night. She wasn't wearing anything abnormal – a regular pajama blouse that covered her up far enough so Yosuke wouldn't attempt to sneak any peeks – Yosuke wasn't convinced that she was entirely alright for the night. Remilia had dug into her pant pocket for her phone and opened it up to see if she received any text messages – which, obviously, she did not. It was at this time that Yosuke walked up to her in his casual pajama wear, and although Remilia would normally make a comment about how he shouldn't be wearing boxers so openly, she seemed more distracted about something rather than sneaking a comment at him of some sort. He gently shook her, only proving his point that she wasn't alright _further _when she did not respond.

"Yo! Remi?" He waved his hand in front of her eyes, looking more than just a "bit concerned" once she made a slow turn to face him, "What's gotten into you? You don't look like you're having fun... Do you want to go home?"

"Huh-! Oh; No.. I'll be fine," She faked a smile and forced a laugh, plopping back onto the sheets that she chose and looking up at the fan that had it's blades spinning around in a clockwise motion. It didn't make her dizzy like it normally did – probably due to the light still being on at a time like this – but it suddenly got her thinking about how her life was merely a cycle, and how everything would probably take course for the better or worse. The more she delved into the memory of watching the video, and the more she thought about the Investigation Team's fate that she was basically holding her own hands – a possible chance they could face their death in the Midnight Channel if they were not careful of whatever steps they took. She was the strategist, after all, and as the strategist she and Izanagi had to work together to basically save the friends they have obtained so far.

Yosuke wasn't convinced by her sudden response, and actually pulled by the arm to make her sit back up on her knees again. When she felt this happen, she was a bit irritated; Though, at the same time, she understood why he acted this way around her.

He was concerned, and it was _okay _for him to be concerned about her.

She was well aware about Saki Konishi, and how he had done everything he could in his power in order to charm her and show that he could care for others. When they had fought against his Shadow for the very first time, the truth about Yosuke's feelings on Junes, Inaba, and their _senpai _alone had Remilia contemplate and comprehend what he was truly thinking on the inside. The hatred in her blood boiled whenever Yosuke had allowed all of the harbored negativity take over his body and mind, and the way she battled against the Shadow after teaming up with Izanagi had clearly shown the amount of determination she was willing to give for anyone she had considered a friend: acquaintance or not. She could have basically died in there with the way she fought for the first time, but had not given up until she delivered the final blow to her opponent.

She would begin to wonder if Yosuke would do the same for her if he had been the Fool's Arcana, but had not dwelled on it all that much because Yosuke had nudged her once more.

"He-_llo_?!" Yosuke flailed in front of her, placing his hand on her forehead for a quick second before taking it off, "Are you even _alive_? You're obviously lying with the way you're feeling right now, and there's no way in hell am I going to accept 'I'm fine' as an excuse, you know."

She heard his response and simply let out a light gasp, her glance moving to the floor and her eyes almost forcing themselves shut so she wouldn't have to look at him in the eyes.

"I'm here to help you if you need me, Remi; Anytime!" He waved his hand in the air, "However, I can't do that if you're not going to let me in – you get what I'm saying?"

"Yes, I _know _what you're saying!" She grumbled, eyes hardening before softening with quick blinks of the eyes, "I'm just.. I'm thinking about what Mom had basically told me in that video we saw."

The hand that was on her shoulder soon had it's fingers grip her tightly, as if to reassure her that things would happen and things would get better.

"Remi..?"

"Yosuke, I'm _scared_," Remilia spoke in quiet whispers, trying to hope that no one else would hear them even though that was fairly obvious, "I'm so afraid of doing the wrong thing and causing you guys to get killed at this point in time; I'm not a good leader, I _never was_!"

"Hey, hey, don't say that," He retorted, sitting atop of his futon as he spoke to her, "You are _too _a good leader – a _damn _good one at that. Do you even _recall _what you did to save my ass a few months ago?"

"You don't-!"

"I understand _completely_!" The argument would have consisted of more screaming, but due to the fact that it was extremely late at night, they had to deal with harsh whispers and gruff voices to whisper _in_. "You're basically blaming yourself for those who have died so far, and you're blaming it all on not being a 'good leader.' You're so afraid of slipping up that it's hard for us to even fight correctly against a Shadow because you are very hesitant in what you do. But, that's still okay because people tend to do that at times!"

"It's not okay, because what if we go search somewhere and we end up being defeated and kicked out of the TV world or someone else is killed before we can even reach them..?" Her body was trembling, and her face was turning red, "And that's not exactly it; That hasn't been it at all – you're not even on the right track, which makes what you're saying _completely invalid_!"

"The hell it doesn't, Remilia, and you know this for a fact." He pulled her close enough that they were face to face at times like this, and there was nothing to show in his chocolate colored eyes other than a stare that could basically kill her off if she wasn't careful. "You've.. You've been acting really awkward around me as of recent, and goddammit, it's starting to piss me off! It's always around _me _that you tend to space out the most, yet when you're out with Chie nothing happens!"

He let go of her and balled his hands into fists – clearly frustrated at himself, Remilia, and what had been around them as of recent.

"... Look; I really wish you would tell me how you feel, rather than attempt to be so modest around me," He muttered quietly, "Do you even get what the word 'partner' means to me...?"

Saying this made her perk up.

"You're _my _partner, and I chose you because you know _very well _what you're handling. You never had this power of Persona before, but you still fight like you are some sort of pro and I like seeing that spunk out of you," His compliments towards her were the only things that got her to pay attention, "You're bright, and funny as hell; And at the same time, you hate to see anyone in danger."

"But the only thing you're in danger of losing at this point would be _**yourself**_, Remi!"

Remilia suddenly covered her mouth to resist the urge to scream out and wake everyone else up. When Yosuke finished attempting to snap some sense into her, she felt her body suddenly grow extremely cold. Her heart begin to sink, in fact she felt it hit her with a sharp pang – hands clutching the area that the organ would be in and her gaze on Yosuke suddenly being broken to refrain from showing him any more tears. Wasn't Yosuke right? If she had not obtained her Persona at first, wouldn't her Shadow have harbored all of this if she wasn't careful? Then again, when she thought about it, Shadows _could _still come back if their theories were true, and she wouldn't want her Persona to suddenly stop working in order for the others to fight her Shadow for her. She didn't want everyone realizing how useless she truly felt when it came to being a leader of anything.

"... Remi..."

"I...I-I...!"

She took a deep breath and hesitated before crossing her arms over her chest, realizing that Yosuke would allow her to say everything on her chest.

"Yosuke, I... really.."

"_**I love you, Hanamura. . !**_"

Surely the voice was slightly above a whisper, but either way she knew the point came across clearly, yet confusing.

She could've sworn there was a tint on Yosuke's cheeks – a faint tint, "Wha... what?"

"... I love you," She suddenly became quiet again – blush ultimately traveling from ear-to-ear and she's suddenly stuttering, "I love you so much, but at the same time, I'm really scared. I.. I almost began to hate Konishi-_senpai_ for basically treating you like ultimate shit, but I couldn't. I knew how much she meant to you..."

Her breath hitched, and she wiped some of the tears off her eyes, "But, I knew I couldn't hate her because she was like the love of your life. I was angry, because.. I felt that you weren't ever going to get over her and start looking for others.."

"Plus, you even said Yukiko was your type..."

But instead of getting some sort of sympathetic response from Yosuke, all she heard was him beginning to laugh – and all she wanted to do at that point was gut him or slap him across the face.

Yet, for some reason, she couldn't bring herself to do so, and so she simply snapped and asked what was so funny.

"I'm sorry, I'm not laughing at your _confession_, I'm laughing at your thoughts," He snickered – simply doing nothing but shaking his head, "Don't you get it, Remi? Yukiko may be my type, but you know how she is! She wouldn't even _dare _to attempt a relationship with me; Have you seen how badly she's hit me for even saying something that wasn't even _related _to that subject?"

Hearing that made Remilia chuckle – and while laughing, she hadn't realized Yosuke had walked up to her – both faces and bodies quite close to each other to the point where even _Remilia _would become flustered at the stealth-filled movements Hanamura was making towards her at this point. She would stop laughing at this point and lock eyes with the teenage boy in front of her – making a note to herself that her whole face was extremely hot, red, and unable to cool down with anything that she might do.

"Yosuke?"

He tilted her head up and allowed his lips to connect with her own – Remilia almost yelping at the connection before closing her eyes and allowing the foreign feeling to sink in and process within the brain. She wasn't exactly expecting this – in fact, she wasn't expecting this at _**all**_. It was just going to be a simple sleepover with a potential viewing of several different movies and a small pillow fight before they headed to bed for the night. She had also brought her bookbags, too, so the next morning they would wake up and study a little bit before the midterms. Instead, it turned into a sudden confession of feelings, a tiny amount of comfort, and a few actions leading to what could turn into some sort of awkward make-out session if she had the courage and the bravery to allow it.

When Yosuke discontinued the kiss he too, had an insane amount of blush that Remilia had never seen before on his face.

Had she even _seen _him blush before? She wasn't exactly sure.

"If this makes _any _sense at all, I'd have to say, well... _you're _my type, Remilia," He'd chuckle, ruffling the hair on her head, "You try your best even though you're horrible with studying – like me –, as much as you say you aren't, you're a _great _leader when it comes to taking us around the areas, and you're always trying your best to make sure everyone is pretty alright before doing anything else!"

He shuffled left and right, looking down at the floor before looking back up, "Aww, man, this is so embarrassing.. but at the same time, I can understand how you feel. I don't see why you'd want to be with a guy like me, though, I'm nothing special."

"Oh come on, Yosuke," It was Remi's turn to retort, shoving him slightly, "You were giving _me _some sort of speech about me being your partner; It basically goes the same way for you, you know."

"Wh-what?! That's a bunch of bull-"

"Nope..!" She interrupted him again, immediately pulling him into a huge embrace and laughing all the while, "Except.. It's a bit different for me, as you can tell..."

The room suddenly became quiet, and the two of them basically stayed in a hugging position for the meantime. Being the Fool Arcana allowed her to feel the bonds between both her and her friends, and taking note of the Magician's emotions during this hug session was something she found extremely important to her. She would not want to hurt Yosuke in any way, and in return, she hoped that Yosuke would feel the same when it came to this.

"... I love you, Remilia." He muttered, tightening the hold, "And I'm not going to let you go so easily, either."

"I love you too, Yosuke, thank you so much.." was her final reply before the two had decided that it would be best for them to head to bed for the night.

And although Remilia was as jealous as she could be beforehand, it all began to disappear once she realized that what Yosuke had been saying before was the truth.

"Expect the unexpected," is what she should have learned rather than being afraid of saying anything to the goof she knew as Yosuke Hanamura!


End file.
